Video: 12 Weeks on T Update

On “Vacation”: Quick Check-In

I made a video, but I’m too exhausted to get it uploaded.  My trip has gone very well and I’m having a great time- but I’m still frustrated by the fact that I couldn’t do anything about the timing of this trip in relation to my personal life and how my research was going.  This trip is really important to my relationships with my family- there has already been some good connections made.  Seeing both friends from high school and undergrad has been very encouraging and a ton of fun.  It is weird being back in this house after having lived completely on my own for a year though.

Lately I’ve been pretty torn up emotionally.  My relationship fell apart right before I left Minneapolis, and I’ve put a lot into keeping it together and pulling it back together.  I finally realized that she has to want to be in it and take care of herself enough to be capable of it- the entire downward spiral of our relationship evolved from fears of me leaving down the road and apprehension for my top surgery.  Instead of working on these things with me, a third party has been added to the mix.  I’m on “vacation” and have no idea what I’m returning home to in Minneapolis.  We haven’t really been in contact, and it’s killing me.  She could want to be with me and working on it, or she could be happily “moved on” to the other person.